Saturday, March 21, 2015

How To Make The News Less Interesting Than C-SPAN

Back on March 7 Chris Hemsworth hosted SNL. I know, that was like 2 weeks ago, but there’s been some confusion on the blogs so here I am again. Anyway, the episode was hosted by Thor, also known as Captain Kirk’s dad and a guy who got shot in the head in Red Dawn (SPOILER), and he did a decent job. Naturally, they did an Avengers sketch like they did when Jeremy Renner hosted a while ago. Of course, the one featuring Jeremy Renner was much funnier, as it had Jason Sudeikis as Iron Man and featured Hawkeye running out of arrows while this one had the Avengers just happy that they defeated Robert California’s robot from The Office. But overall, Hemsworth did a decent job. The whole episode caused me to chuckle a few times, so that was fine I guess. But this blog is not about SNL as a whole, it’s about the Weekend Update, and this one was disappointing.

He was in The Office as Robert California, a weirdo boss.

Maybe disappointing isn’t the right word, because I did not go into this Update with high expectations. If anything, I was thinking “Hey, they can’t do worse than last week’s! That one was terrible!” Well, I was too much of an optimist. (I know, right, how is that optimistic?) This Weekend Update, while slightly better than the horrible one featuring “Riblet,” still missed the mark badly, and I am definitely losing faith in the writers of SNL. The head writer is supposedly Colin Jost, also known as “The Blandest Host To Ever Host The Weekend Update,” so that explains a lot. Okay, let’s get started in the analysis of this dreadful segment.
For once, Michael Che was given the first joke, and he discussed Ferguson statistics of African-American arrests (alliteration there) and was decently funny. Not laugh-out-loud funny, but not unfunny either.
Next, Colin Jost discussed Hillary Clinton releasing her emails, and then joked about who would have to read 50,000 emails from a grandma and how they would likely be about Obama being a Kenyan. Interesting.

So she might be President. God help us all.

Jost then joked about Benjamin Netanyahu giving a speech about Iran and apparently how he became the Republican frontrunner for President. So I guess that was supposed to be funny.
You know, it really annoys me when these anchors think their jokes are so hilarious and they aren’t, but instead, are just bland and stupid. Norm Macdonald, the best host ever, would often tell edgy and complicated jokes that he knew were funny, and the audience wouldn’t understand, so Macdonald would just stare at the audience to let them know that the joke was funny. Colin Jost attempts to replicate this from time to time, but it doesn’t work because his jokes aren’t funny!
Then Jost told two unfunny jokes about a plane skidding in snow.
Next, Che told a joke about Bill Clinton’s Presidential painting and how it supposedly contains a shadow about Monica Lewinsky and how the painting also features Clinton without pants. A little less unfunny than Jost’s jokes about a drunk pilot.
Then Leslie Jones, a new cast member as of this season, gave relationship advice as an Update guest. She was decently funny here, but definitely could have been funnier. She portrayed herself as just an angry woman, somewhat like Melissa McCarthy, and talked about New York City’s blocks being miles long and the subways having pooping rats and just a lot of random stuff. The funniest part of this bit, and I can’t believe I’m about to say this, was Colin Jost, the so-called “interviewer” here. He made two sarcastic comments that were decently funny. Leslie was screaming, questioning why it had to be so cold, and Jost replied “I think because it’s winter.” Yay sarcasm! After that, Jost should have just left the building.
But he didn’t.
Anyway, Jones left, and Michael Che told a joke about Michael Jordan becoming a billionaire and Scotty Pippen selling Forbes magazines. So that was decently funny.
Then Colin Jost told his second funny joke of the night.
“Justin Bieber this week turned 21 years old, but his mustache thinks he turned 13.”
It’s always fun to hear of Justin Bieber bashing, but it’s less funny to hear it a week after a far superior comedian did a similar and funnier bit. On Monday, March 2, Conan O’Brien, on his show aptly named Conan, discussed Justin Bieber’s birthday in his opening monologue.
Conan: “Yesterday, Justin Bieber turned 21 years old. [Everyone in the audience boos, naturally.] Justin started celebrating on Saturday, 5 years ago.”
[After about 5 seconds of laughter.]
Conan:  “Forget the joke, because it’s forgettable, but what I found much more interesting is that I announced that a human being was still alive after 21 years, and the audience booed. ‘Oh hey, this guy turned 21—‘    ‘Booooo!!!! Still alive, eh???’”
Andy Richter: “’Seems like he’s been around for 40 years!’”
Conan: “You’re a soulless group, that’s what I have to say to you.”
Now, don’t get me wrong, the Colin Jost joke about Justin Bieber was funny, but I much prefer the Conan O’Brien exchange. I think that what really makes it funny is the audience interaction. The Weekend Update generally has an audience interaction of “Anchor tells joke and audience laughs like trained monkeys.” But Conan was able to do so much more than the Weekend Update with this audience interaction! It is interesting to note that O’Brien used to be a writer for SNL, back in the 80s, when there were good music and good movies filled with cheesy and awesome one-liners and terrific, memorable characters. Gosh, I’m going off-topic. What made Conan’s bit here funny was the ability to improvise, which is something the Weekend Update hosts need to feel free to do more of. Colin Jost can actually be funny when he is not following his own horribly-written jokes. SNL in general is funniest when cast members improvise and surprise other cast members in sketches and in the Weekend Update. It is that sense of surprise that makes the Weekend Update funny, both spontaneous surprises and surprises like “Oh, did that guy really go there with that joke?” (I’m referring to Jebidiah Atkinson and Norm Macdonald there.)
After telling that Bieber joke, Che and Jost joked back and forth (scripted, of course) about Ben Carson.
Then Che talked about a man who was arrested by police for possession of marijuana in a container labeled “Not Weed.” Che said that the police car was labeled “Not Police.”
That was funny, but guess what? Conan O’Brien discussed that story on Monday as well. Conan said that the man was found “Not not guilty.” So I guess that Conan’s joke was probably less funny than the Weekend Update joke, but that’s not necessarily the point. What’s interesting is that the two funniest Weekend Update jokes were about storylines that Conan O’Brien already discussed FIVE DAYS EARLIER. I get that you need to find funny stories to talk about in the Weekend Update, but I do not think it’s a coincidence that they were taken from Conan O’Brien’s opening monologue on his show. These are valid news stories, and they did happen, but I still find it interesting, that’s all. I am not suggesting that SNL, in its desperation to tell funny jokes on the Weekend Update, is stealing jokes from Conan O’Brien, and likely other talk show hosts. I am not suggesting that, okay? Okay. (Fault in Our Stars reference OMG! John Green strikes again!)

Aww, how sweet! Cancer!

Anyway, after this, there was one funny joke about rats and fleas spreading the bubonic plague and how that’s just a black mark on the stellar record of fleas on New York rats’ backs. The final guest was Cecily Strong’s Girl You Wish You Hadn’t Started a Conversation With At a Party. Her character was a ditzy girl who has no idea what she’s talking about with regards to current world issues like ISIS and terrorism. This was decently funny but nothing too special. Then this abysmal Update ended.

So, what can we conclude? For one, the Weekend Update is not really improving. It is still bland and quite unfunny at times. Also, Colin Jost needs a new job. This one isn’t working for him. Finally, SNL is suspiciously using stories that Conan O’Brien already used five days before. Maybe Conan should write for SNL and maybe it can be funny again. In the meantime we’re stuck with the Dynamic Duo of Blandman and Robbin’. That is, the jokes are bad and they’re robbing us of our time and energy. There’s no new SNL this Saturday, but next Saturday (March 28) Dwayne The Rock Johnson is hosting. Hopefully the Rock can give a solid performance that can be the foundation for funny jokes. Hopefully he gives a Herculean effort and make us less fast to turn off the TV because we are so furious at the Update anchors. I hope they have a good game plan, but in the meantime, we’ll just have nothing to do but play with G.I. Joe action figures. Please let me know if you have any comments or questions about that pun-filled last paragraph or the post as a whole. Good afternoon, good evening, and good night.

Saturday, March 7, 2015

Jebidiah Atkinson Reviews The Most Recent Weekend Update Segment

On February 28, Dakota Johnson hosted SNL, and I guess I’m supposed to write a blog about that episode’s Weekend Update. So I will, and it shall be written as Jebidiah Atkinson would write a review. For a reminder as to how he writes and speaks, watch this.
Now, read this review in his voice.
This past Weekend Update makes me wish I was Hellen Keller so I wouldn’t have to see or hear it! Colin Jost? More like Rotten Host! This wannabe Seth Myers clone couldn’t make someone laugh even if they were under anesthesia's laughing-gas! He is so one-dimensional that a line has more personality than him! He has less facial expressions than Darth Vader and less voice inflection than an emotionless robot! His jokes are so bland that vanilla ice cream is ashamed to have him compared to it! You know what is funnier than Colin Jost? Everything! Even Schindler’s List and Psycho are funnier than Colin Jost!


Schindler's List: One of the saddest movies ever made.

Okay, Jebidiah, he’s not that bad. I mean, come on, didn’t he have a funny joke this week about ADD?
Colin Jost is the stupidest host to sit behind the Weekend Update desk! Oh, his chest hurts because he has ADD? Well mine does too, because any time he tells a joke, my heart tries to stop beating to put me out of my misery! Only Colin Jost could take a hilarious story about runaway llamas and make the punchline unfunny. Only he could ruin a perfect premise like that!


Runaway Llamas. And Colin Jost couldn't even make that premise funny.

I mean, Colin Jost was still funny, right? Didn’t he also have that other funny joke about…
…um
…give me a moment
…I got nothing.
I take your point, Jebidiah.
But what about Michael Che? Didn’t he at least make you smile at his jokes about marijuana, and marijuana, and steroids, and Obama, and Biden?
Michael Che told jokes? Sorry, I couldn’t hear over his stuttering! How difficult is it to read a cue card, Michael Che? Certainly not much more difficult than destroying the funniest segment in SNL history, right? It takes skill to take the simple task of telling jokes off of a cue card and completely failing at it by turning it into pure garbage!  You know who could read the cue cards better than Michael Che?
Who?
The little blind boy from Dumb and Dumber whose bird was decapitated! At least the bird doesn’t have to hear the horrible jokes that make up the Weekend Update right now!
Okay, come on, that’s a bit harsh.
Harsh is my job! At least I’m good at it.


The Blind Boy from Dumb and Dumber whose bird's head is duct taped to its body.

Well, what about the guest characters this week? Didn’t you like Kate McKinnon as Justice Ginsberg? Or Jay Pharaoh as Kanye West apologizing in a song? Or even Bobby Moynihan as Riblet?
I didn’t like any of the night’s guest characters at all! Justice Ginsberg? Oh, so Kate McKinnon did her Justin Bieber impression while wearing a gown? How original! If I wanted to be bored to death I would watch C-Span! At least that Justice Ginsberg would have an ounce of, oh what do you call it, humor? Even the blind boy from Dumb and Dumber had to shield his eyes from this awful character!
You really like that Dumb and Dumber blind boy huh?
I don’t like any people in the world, especially the blind! You know your life is terrible when the dog is walking you!
Oh, come on, that’s terrible, Jebidiah! Now, let’s stay on track. What about the Kanye West impression? Wasn’t that funny?
I’m sorry, was I supposed to want to blow my brains out during that hilarious scene? If so, then Saturday Night Live really succeeded with that one! They really hit it right on the nose! They beat anyone else to the punch with that song! Oh, never mind that the far superior Wayne’s World already dealt with Kanye West TWO WEEKS earlier! But no, this time they create an annoying song to show how clever the writing staff is right now on SNL. You know, I think the real Kanye West would have stormed the stage if the song Jay Pharaoh sang was actually funny!
So you didn’t like Jay Pharaoh’s impression of Kanye West?
Impression? Oh, sorry, I fell asleep halfway through the song!
Okay then… Now you’ve got to tell me you enjoyed Riblet. I mean, that guy’s hilarious!
Don’t get me started on Riblet! If there is one person less funny than Colin Jost, it is Riblet! I’m supposed to laugh that he has hair that makes him look like Mickey Mouse, right? You know you’re scraping the bottom of the barrel when your main source of comedy comes from a hair style! Riblet couldn’t be funny if he was grilled and put in a sandwich drenched in barbecue sauce! Oh, he wants to steal Michael Che’s jorb? Well good, while he does that, he can steal another five minutes from my life and finish his mission of stealing my sanity!


This is funny nowadays.

Well, Jebidiah, were you really sane to begin with?
Sanity is a relative term! You may call an insane man sane, but he can call sane men insane and call himself sane, so which one is truly insane, you might ask? I’ll tell you: Riblet! And not insane in the good way either. It’s insane that anyone on the show thought that Riblet MIGHT be even remotely CLOSE to funny! You know what I would order if SNL owned a restaurant? The Riblet with a drizzle of stupidity and with a side of wasted time and unfunny jokes, and I would go out and feed Riblet to the dogs! The bombing of Hiroshima has NOTHING on the bombing of this excuse for a character!
I’m sorry, Jebidiah, that is just really harsh! I mean, wasn’t his microphone drop hilarious?
Back in my day, we didn’t have microphones! If you did something well, you didn’t drop a microphone, you received applause and maybe got a new acre of tobacco for it, I don’t know, it was too long ago! Today, you audiences laugh at anything that is told as a joke, even if it’s not funny! You’re the equivalent of a laugh track, except laugh tracks actually signify when something is humorous!
Okay, Jebidiah, have you liked any Weekend Update segments ever? Surely you must have loved the Hanukkah song!
Oh the Hanukkah song! (To the Hanukkah theme) Adam Sandler – tries to be funny – and he’s not but guess what is – the fact that he’s made money! NEXT! Norm Macdonald? Hey, OJ Simpson called, and you’re next on his list. NEXT! Stefon? The character so stupid and unfunny that Bill Hader had to laugh to get any audience reaction? Pass. NEXT! Mr. Dennis Miller. He was so terrible that his hair tried to strangle him to keep him from speaking! NEXT! 


Look at that luscious hair that could literally strangle a person.
Go Mr. Miller!


Colin Quinn! Who was this guy? I’m sorry, I legitimately forgot who he was. Is he still around? Does he have this thing called a career? NEXT! Jimmy Fallon! More like Jimmy FAIL-on! The only good thing he did for the show was leave! NEXT! And now we get to the worst person to ever be a part of the Weekend Update. But I probably shouldn’t talk about this one since everyone got all upset about what I said about the blind!
Yeah, you probably shouldn’t—
I am going to say it! The worst person to ever be on the Weekend Update is an 1860s Newspaper critic named Jebidiah Atkinson! This is such a one-note character that he does the exact same thing every time he is on the show! But people fall for it, because they love cynical critical opinions that spew hate on everything because that’s what stupid hipsters are all about these days! This character is so one-dimensional that he’s going to be made into a sequel to a Wrinkle In Time. It’s going to be called “Journey to the 1st Dimension” and it will star Colin Jost!

Jebidiah Atkinson is not a fan.

That’s Jebidiah Atkinson for you. Goodbye everybody! If you enjoyed this blog or were completely confused by it, then please let me know in the comments. There should be a new SNL on March 7 with Chris Hemsworth (Thor) hosting, so let’s hope he really hammers home a good performance. Let’s hope he’s lightning on the set, and that he will receive thunderous applause. Hopefully he can avenge the last dreadful episode, and maybe, just maybe, bring some light to the dark world that is SNL right now.

Sources: (Links to that week's catastrophe)
This Week's Weekend Update Part 1
Part 2

Sunday, March 1, 2015

BIOGRAPHY BLOG: NORM MACDONALD

There will be a new SNL this weekend, on February 28, but there was not one this previous week, so I’m going to start a new series of blogs about the Weekend Update hosts themselves, in which I will discuss the hosts’ tenures on the Weekend Update, along with the whole before and after deal. Basically, like a mini-biography. So, for this first one, it only makes sense that I start out with the best Weekend Update host ever: Norm Macdonald.
Now, since this is a Weekend Update blog, I will mainly discuss Macdonald’s time as the Weekend Update anchor, but I guess I should mention that he was a stand-up comedian before being a Weekend Update anchor. So he already had good experience with writing and delivering topical jokes.
Macdonald joined SNL in 1993 and left in 1998 after being fired (for reasons that we’ll discuss later). He actually hosted the Weekend Update from 1994 to 1997, and as a host, was considered by Chevy Chase to be the best for the job, besides Chevy Chase, of course. (For those of you who don’t know, Chevy Chase was the first ever Weekend Update host who set the stage for everyone else. If I do more of these biographical blogs, Chase’s will be my next.) Macdonald was not only confined to the Weekend Update desk; he also participated in some sketches doing impressions and other characters. The most notable sketch he participated in was the ongoing Celebrity Jeopardy, in which he impersonated Burt Reynolds.
But enough of that, let’s talk about Norm Macdonald as the Weekend Update anchor. Macdonald was the best Update anchor ever, in my honest opinion, because of his wit and willingness to insult anyone and everyone. He had ongoing jokes making fun of Frank Stallone, Michael Jackson, OJ Simpson, and David Hasselhoff, to name a few. He would often tell a joke about something such as Jupiter’s moon Europa having the ability to support one primitive life form, then would say “Who? You guessed it: Frank Stallone.” About Michael Jackson, Macdonald would often make fun of Jackson’s well-known scandal of sexual child abuse, calling him a “Homosexual pedophile.” His words, not mine, okay? In his words, Macdonald would also frequently say that OJ Simpson was guilty of murder, as I will discuss later since it relates to Macdonald’s firing. Finally, with David Hasselhoff, Macdonald would constantly tell some joke relating to Germany, then say “further evidence of my old theory that Germans love David Hasselhoff.” Macdonald went so far as to have Hasselhoff appear on the Weekend Update all to prove his own theory. (For more details, read my first blog. It’s great.)


The German Dodgeball team bonding over a picture of David Hasselhoff

Norm Macdonald also had ongoing gags aside from constant mockery of these famous/infamous people. He would often times pull out a tape recorder in a “Note to self” relating to a bit of news he had just given. Macdonald would also refer to fake books and magazines, such as the medical journal “Duh” and his own magazine “Things I Wish Really Happened.”
Norm Macdonald was just hilarious at the Weekend Update desk, being so rude and mean to some people. His jokes were edgy and funny, which everyone watching the Update loved, except for some NBC executives. He kept his job longer than most would expect, especially after cursing on air. When delivering news about a museum for broadcast journalism, Macdonald jumbled up his lines and then dropped the F-bomb, which is the worst possible thing an SNL cast member can possibly do. Like seriously, this is grounds for firing. But Norm Macdonald played it off well. The cursing caused the audience to bust up with laughter and applause, which Macdonald, smirking at the whole debacle, responded to saying “Aha, my farewell performance…” and then finished the joke. A week went by, and NBC only received 3 complaints about the cursing. Three complaints! So Norm went back to the Weekend Update desk the next week, and that Saturday night he killed it. (Insert OJ Simpson joke) He refrained from cursing (even catching himself and saying “oh drat!”)and he used his week-old mistake as a springboard for another joke that both made fun of himself and Vermont.
“With the resignation of two police officers in Vergennes, Vermont, the city’s 2,500 residents are now left with only one policeman. [Takes out tape recorder and puts it to face] Note to self: if I get fired for cursing on the air last week, drive up to Vergennes, Vermont, hypnotize the remaining policeman, and loot town. [Crowd laughs, obviously]”
See? This is the genius that is Norm Macdonald. Now, for more genius, read the quotes below:

“Who are safer drivers: men, or women? Well, according to a new survey, 55 percent of adults feel that women are most responsible for minor ‘fender benders’ while 78 percent blame men for most fatal crashes. Please note that the percentages in these pie graphs do not add up to 100 percent because the math was done by a woman. [Laughter and boos/hisses by audience] For those of you hissing at that joke it should be noted that that joke was written by a woman. So now you don’t know what the hell to do, eh? [Lots of laughing] Nah, I’m just kidding, we don’t hire women. [Laughter ensues]”
“Well David Hasselhoff is a huge star in Germany where his syndicated series Knight Rider places a consistent second behind BayWatch in the ratings, which once again proves my old theory: Germans love David Hasselhoff.”
Norm Macdonald with evidence of his David Hasselhoff theory.

“Kenny G has a Christmas album out this year. Hey, happy birthday Jesus! Hope you like crap!”
“This week, supermodel Claudia Schiffer broke up with magician David Copperfield. Later, a devastated Copperfield wandered out onto the street and was hit by a bus. This, according to the current issue of ‘Things I wish Really Happened.’”
Note another story: "Whiskey Cures AIDS"

“A one-legged goose with a dart in its head. And I complain about my life.”


"A study says that pot use in high school is up sharply. Don’t I know it!”
“…I don’t really sell drugs to children.”

“A new study says that people who quit smoking have healthier lungs. Yet another groundbreaking story from the pages of the medical journal: ‘Duh.’”

“And in music news: number one on the college charts this summer was ‘Better Than Ezra.’ And at number two: Ezra.”
“In a recent interview, Christine Brinkley suggested that football players should have special gloves connected to lights on their helmets. That way, when they catch the ball, you’ll know who has possession. Read these and other interesting ideas in Christine’s new book: ‘I’m an Idiot.’”
(After Will Ferrell vomits) “Well, in Albany, New York, Susan John has been asked to resign as chairwoman of the State Assembly of Alcohol and Drug Abuse Committee, following her arrest on drunk driving charges. On the bright side for Miss John, she has been asked to chair the Assembly’s committee on irony. Note to self: never ever follow a vomit-spewing guy with a joke. [Proceeds to eat some of the vomit.]It’s good! It’s quite good!  Normally I don’t like Will Ferrell vomit, but this is actually very good!”
So hopefully you read those quotes, saw those pictures, and thought “Hey, this guy was funny!” If you didn’t, then you have no sense of humor. So for the sane people you might be wondering “How could he get fired for being funny?” Well, here’s the interesting thing: Norm Macdonald was fired because he supposedly “wasn’t funny.”
Yeah, I know, it’s stupid.
Here’s the full story and the necessary background.
OJ Simpson divorced his wife Nicole Brown in 1992 (they had been married since 1985). On June 13, 1994, Nicole Brown and her boyfriend Ronald Goldman were found stabbed to death, and OJ Simpson was the prime suspect, due to evidence found at the scene. Simpson tried to run away (let me clarify: drive away) and was involved in a large-scale, widely televised police chase, that ended with his surrender and eventual trial for the double murder. Simpson was defended by the enthusiastic Johnnie Cochran and a team of capable lawyers. The prosecution had DNA and circumstantial evidence linking OJ to the murders, and the defense had theories that Columbian drug people or assassins had committed the murders. One of the biggest pieces of evidence was a blood-soaked left-handed glove found at the crime scene and a matching right-handed glove at Simpson’s house. However, the defense was able to prove well enough that much of the evidence was unreliable due to perjury. And with the gloves, Cochran got the prosecution to have OJ Simpson try on the murder-glove, and he did, and the glove didn’t fit, so, as Cochran famously said: “If it doesn’t fit, you must acquit.” It is interesting to note that Simpson’s hands were inflamed when he tried on the glove, and not only that, but he was wearing gloves under the one he was trying on! So anyway, the jury acquitted OJ Simpson of the murder, setting him free. That’s the backstory. Now here’s how it ties in with Norm Macdonald.

Even Seinfeld parodied the OJ Simpson case with Jackie Chiles, a lawyer modeled after Johnnie Cochran.

Norm Macdonald would always advocate the idea that OJ Simpson was guilty, during and after the trial. Here are a few examples:
“Well in a questionable move by the defense team this week, OJ Simpson demonstrated how to stab two people at the same time.”
[After the acquittal] “Well it is finally official. Murder is legal in the state of California.”
“OJ Simpson was in a different kind of courtroom this week attempting to regain custody of his two children. In order to prove to the court how much he loves his kids, OJ pointed out quote ‘Hey, they’re still alive, aren’t they?’”
(About OJ Simpson’s lawyer) “It was revealed this week that defense lawyer Johnnie Cochran once abused his first wife. In his defense, Cochran said: ‘Hey, at least I didn’t kill her like some people I know!’”
“In his book, OJ Simpson says that he would have taken a bullet or stood in front of a train for Nicole. Man, I’m gonna tell you that is some bad luck when the one guy who would have died for you kills you.”
So Norm Macdonald was not exactly professional or impartial about the whole OJ Simpson debacle, but he was certainly funny about it, which is what a comedy show requires, right? Well… that’s an interesting story. Don Ohlmeyer was an NBC West Coast Executive, and a personal friend of OJ Simpson. In 1998 he insisted that Norm Macdonald be fired for “not being funny.” So Norm Macdonald was suddenly fired for not being funny by a guy who was friends with a guy who Macdonald constantly bashed. Something fishy is there. Norm Macdonald took it well, going on David Letterman and saying that Ohlmeyer was a nice guy (a fat one at that) and would say that the idea of it being a conspiracy theory was a weird thesis. I personally agree with the whole conspiracy theory idea because it makes sense.

Norm Macdonald giving a monologue while hosting SNL... and getting his revenge!!!

Don’t worry though, Norm Macdonald got his revenge. A year and a half later, in 1999, Macdonald was invited back to the show to host, and boy did he share his opinion. In his opening monologue he said the following:
“When the people here asked me to do the show, I've got to say, I felt kind of weird. I don't know if you remember this, but I used to actually be on this show. I used to do the 'Weekend Update' news routine, you remember that? That's where I did the make-believe news jokes. That was me, you know? So then, a year and a half ago, I had sort of a disagreement with the management at NBC. I wanted to keep my job. Right? And they felt the exact opposite. They fired me because they said that I wasn't funny. Now, with most jobs, I could have had a hell of a lawsuit on my hands for that, but see, this is a comedy show. So, they got me. But, now, this is the weird part, it's only a year and a half later, and now, they ask me to host the show. So I wondered, how did I go from being not funny enough to be even allowed in the building, to being so funny that I'm now hosting the show? How did I suddenly get so goddamn funny?! It was inexplicable to me, because, let's face it, a year and a half is not enough time for a dude to learn how to be funny! Then it occurred to me, I haven't gotten funnier, the show has gotten really bad! So, yeah, I'm funny compared to, you know, what you'll see later. Okay, so let's recap, the bad news is: I'm still not funny. The good news is: The show blows! Alright, folks, we've got a bad show for you tonight! Dr. Dre, Snoop Doggie Dogg and Eminem are here. We'll be right back!”
Link For The Actual Monologue Video
Another Link to the Same Video

Is this guy insane or what? He openly insulted the very people of the show he was INVITED to host! Life goals right there. After all that insanity, Macdonald went on to do some more TV shows, including the short-lived but hilarious Sports Show With Norm Macdonald. He still does standup comedy, and he is a genius at it. I mean, at one point he did a routine about how to kill a woman by luring her into a van filled with cheese sandwiches. Recently, he appeared on SNL 40 as Burt Reynolds and as himself to introduce Chevy Chase.
So, let’s recap.

Norm Macdonald was the Weekend Update anchor from 1994 to 1997 and was fired before the 1998 season. During his tenure he was insulting, edgy, and hilarious, being described by Chevy Chase, the original Update anchor, as the funniest anchor since himself. Norm was fired for not being funny, then somehow became so funny in a year and a half that he was invited back to host SNL. Today, the current co-anchor Colin Jost describes Macdonald as his inspiration (which might not be a compliment because Jost is terrible) and Norm is fondly remembered by like everyone as the best Weekend Update host ever. So, to close with his usual ending line: “I’m Norm Macdonald, and now the fake news.”

Sources:
A Video With Tons of Norm Material (The video is in English but the text itself is like Russian or something)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Norm_Macdonald
http://mashable.com/2013/09/27/weekend-update-anchors/
http://uproxx.com/tv/2015/02/norm-macdonald-snl-weekend-update-fired/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/O._J._Simpson_murder_case
http://www.cinemablend.com/television/10-Most-Crucial-Casting-Changes-Saturday-Night-Live-History-43147.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Don_Ohlmeyer#The_Norm_Macdonald_controversy
http://snltranscripts.jt.org/96/96lupdate.phtml
http://snltranscripts.jt.org/99/99cmono.phtml
That Same Monologue Video